


Comparative Analysis

by 221b_hound



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, Kissing, M/M, Post Reichenbach, RL meets fiction, Slash, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-17
Updated: 2012-06-17
Packaged: 2017-11-07 23:13:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/436495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/221b_hound/pseuds/221b_hound
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I wrote this on impulse in response to this prompt on the kinkmeme. It's ridiculous, and lacking in any but the most rudimentary backstory (hello there Captain Jack! I'm sure you'll find a way to locate Sherlock and John and get them home).</p><p>The prompt was itself prompted by video of two people cosplaying at a recent convention, where Sherlock and John's reunion basically goes like this: SMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCH!  The OP said:because it looks like no one else who was at the panel is going to prompt it, Sherlock and John somehow end up a) in our world and b) in Toronto and see this:</p><p>http://rageandtheprince.tumblr.com/post/23832146077/bbc-sherlock-slash-panel-cosplay-kiss-those-two<br/>http://teaparty-at-221b.tumblr.com/post/23827762161</p><p>If you follow the links, be careful of the sound level. The shrieks of glee are deafening.</p><p>Warning: this fic is ridiculous.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Comparative Analysis

Sherlock is fascinated by the results of the experiments with the peculiar wristwatch he'd lifted from the dynamic man with the wicked smile who sang show tunes as he - so he claimed - fought aliens in the Tube. Sherlock had been inclined to believe the man clinically insane, but look where Jack's intriguing watch has brought them. An alternate universe, it seems, or so John explains. John watches those sorts of movies, and so for a change is a little ahead of Sherlock on the curve.

John is trying to be very stoic about it all, just observing, taking mental notes, but there's a buzz of excitement in him. Sherlock distinctly hears John mutter "I'm in an episode of _Star Trek_. This is brilliant!" but the glee ebbs when they find the packed room with a small stage and, bizarrely, two strangers - two women, in fact - apparently re-enacting their painful reunion of six months ago.

The two women are even dressed more or less how John and Sherlock are dressed now. It's a very odd sensation to watch them.

"That's... not how it went." John Watson's protestation is a strangled whisper.

"No," Sherlock agrees, _sotto voce_ , "As I recall there was a good deal more physical violence involved."

"Don't say you didn't deserve it."

"I _don't_ say that. Because the last time I defended myself you punched me _again_."

"Don't start that again. If you didn't subconsciously think you deserved it, you would have ducked. Both times."

"Perhaps both times I saw you lunging at me with your eyes shining like that, I was expecting a completely different response."

"Oh my God, they're doing it _again_."

"And neither time did _their_ approach turn into a black eye," Sherlock notes drily.

John's arms are folded and he's considering the scene critically. "I'm a much better kisser than that," he grumbles.

"I have no basis for comparison," Sherlock says in a disinterested manner, "If the female John punched her version of Sherlock, I could probably give you a comparative analysis of her fighting style."

John glances up at his tall friend, who is looking extremely disgruntled. Sherlock refuses to look back at him.

The occupants of the room are still squealing in ear-splitting delight at the spectacle. John expects Sherlock to stalk out at any moment, but no, he is eyeing the girl-John in her fluffy jumper, an irritated moue thrusting out his bottom lip.

And John's brain finally catches up with the middle of the conversation. _Perhaps both times I saw you lunging at me with your eyes shining like that, I was expecting a completely different response._

"Sherlock?"

"What?" He's properly annoyed now, and about to leave.

"Did you actually think I was going to kiss you? Both times?"

There's an almost imperceptible pause before Sherlock replies: "What an absurd notion." But John has finally caught up with the game, and when he catches on he stays caught, no matter what Sherlock thinks he's hiding.

John grins. Sherlock scowls. John laughs, though it's an affectionate laugh. Sherlock scowls even more darkly.

"Why didn't you say so?" says John.

"Don't be an imbeci...mmffffffff."

For a moment, Sherlock's posture is rigid with indignation, or would be if John hadn't grabbed his lapels and hauled him down to lock their mouths together. But John's right, he's a very good kisser (a conclusion based on comparative analysis) and in moments, Sherlock is kissing him back.

And all around them, the crowd (who recognise committed cosplay when they see it) goes wild at decibel levels that could, and does, shatter glass.

 


End file.
